Back on Track!!

Back!
Back from hiatus.
Back from slump.
Back from slacking.
Back on track!!

Been out form full blast training since last year, since the start of all the niggling injuring with ankle strain then knee strain back in Nov 2009, then an severe ankle sprain this year. Not much chances for recovery with league games coming in thick and fast and went into almost every match battling the intense soreness and the urge to stop running.

Finally the league was over and after some inconsistent physiotherapy sessions, I was told only to come back when my ankle aches again.

So, after holding back the temptation of training heavier weights and running during gym sessions for almost 4 months, I am finally mentally more relief to able myself to train a little harder knowing my ankle has progress much in recovery.

Today's gym session was the longest I ever had, I was literally camping there for the whole 4 hours, reaching there around 2.50pm straight from Penang post-floorball lunch leaving around 6.30pm after cooling down and bathing.

First, I got on with my usual Saturday gym ritual of bathing and relaxing before hitting the cafeteria for a cup of coffee.

Checked my watch, still 30 mins plus before my friend would arrive and therefore decided to drill my ball control at the corner of the gym while waiting. It was rather depressing as I struggle to dribbled pass the weight turned cons obstacles, a testimony of my lack of training since turning more towards coaching. Finally, I gave up and had some fun with juggling instead.

Past 4 and still no sign of my friend, so I decided to carry on with my own training.

Today's focus - core and back and finally, my first 30 minute challenge on the treadmill since... half a year?

It was as tough as I thought it would be. My previous times few days back was hitting just past 3km in 20 minute. Since I have not been training for a long time, I tried to motivate myself what my instructor told me: Get the rhythm back first and not rushing it with speed.

In the end, it was not to bad, I maintained an average speed of 8km/h for 30 mins reaching 3.8km. Close to a month before PBIM which I am challenging myself with a 1 hour time trial for 10k, so it was good progress I guess.

Next week's target, to surpass 4.2km with and try running at 10km/h speed!
I am finally back on track!

10k in 1hr... can onot? >.<

From the Ashes We Shall Rise

Do or die.

Dead we were, but from the ashes we shall rise.

Stronger and mightier.

Because we are...

SPARTANS!!

Before the revival, let me rest in peace...

活？

休息可以走更长远的路，
活着可以做更多的事。

人为何而活？
为活而活？
为何活，活何谓？

为逐梦而活。
人无梦，活而无谓！
有梦而无活，何能圆梦。

活而活，梦而梦。
无梦无活，无活无梦。
活吧！

Split Second

Split second of recklessness,
Split second surge of laziness,
I kept my vehicle in my lane,
and saved me from a smashed windscreen.
A split second difference!!
Phew...

Awake

As a journey is almost near the end,
A new one lies ready to began.

Mountains conquered;
Miles covered,
Obstacles done and undone, again and again.

The future, uncertain;
The constraints, abundance,
Planning always seems in vain.

Headache, frustrate, afraid,
Sometimes all night awake,
Crap, all this for what sake?

For the people we can change,
For the difference we can make,
For the future we can create,
Hmmm... maybe the burden is worth to take.

A little relief, a little awake,
Yet lets not get too ahead,
As unfinished business lies await.
Step by step to take,
Maybe everything will turn out just OK. ^^

Invictus

Invictus (unconquered in Latin)

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

William Ernest Henley

Such inspiring words which change the course of a nation. Dying to watch the movie. According to other sources though, the real piece that was used is the one below, also bloody inspiring.


The Man in the Arena

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

Theodore Roosevelt

Invictus the movie.
there is no showing already. crap.

APAC 2010: Healing the Mental Scar

It has almost been a month since the man returned from his heartbreaking quest, weary he was, frustrated and shattered even much more. Recuperating physically was swift but healing the mental scar... has been slow and painful but maybe revealling...

The journey had been a long and winding ever since he strapped up the stick sword and ball shield. The first few years had been more of a learning curve, gaining experience and building confidence, all working towards the recent one, the real deal, for the cause(s). No more exposure but of expectation!

for ourselves? for each other? for the flag? or for the future?

All was not well, years of tumbling in the dog fights and hellish training have taken toll on the already fragile body. By the time the wounds healed and the aches faded, there was almost not enough opportunities to rediscover the battling touch and rebuild the crumbling confidence. The delayed in equipment parts certainly added troubles to already troubled times. As the saying goes, The Sword is the Warriors' Soul. Having to settle for someone else's gear certainly did not boosted him.

so much gear in the armoury, none of the man.

As the eve draws near, it was a strong faced mask hiding a fragile soul. The last training and the last chance to recapture the warriors' fighting spirit was to no avail. Too long has the limbs been rested, too long has the heart not pumping that hard and too frightened the man was to push the limit fearing new injuries. By the time he travelled with wings to the battlefield, all the man had was a unfit body with a timid mind holding the scattered pieces frantically together as one.

The inevitable happened inevitably.
Old wounds were fine as the tight bandages held firm, but came along new ones, on the foot. Sharp pain pierces through the nerves with every jerking move with the side of the foot banging on the shoes footgear, footgear that might have expired unknowing or naively as expected with such extensive usage.

the war horn blown, it is time.

Bad things suddenly took the turn for the worst. Unable to compete to becoming a casualty of war. The feeling of gazing on towards the battlefield for aside, watching companions fall one by one , fighting losing battles and having to muster every ouch of strength left to roar out, trying to motivate them was far more painful than succumbing to defeat by fighting along side them.

Ugly scenes did occur along the campaign, especially when facing defeat, even more so when the enemy gains unfair lucky advantage on the field. Tired minds fuels temper, tempers ignites fire resulting to bust outs. The man had exchanges with companions and even the commanding officers, his urge to fight held back by the unable physique has clouded his judgement and although he meant good, it was unwise of him speaking his mind out at difficult times. The man acknowledges that and apologized for any confrontation that might have cause unintended misunderstanding.

In the end, it was a humiliating defeat for the man and his company. The campaign was planed but unfortunately not well planned enough, or the enemy was more well prepared, or the warriors were incapable to carry out the plan, or it was everything. One thing the man knew that his time is near the end, maybe it has already ended but he refuses to accept that fact. The man also knows that his generation will continue to struggle in coming battles and it would be wise to avoid it until remedies has been taken to strengthen their position significantly.

time to call it a day?

Cowardice? Maybe, but the man like others of his generation, being forerunners, has wander down the rocky path. A path carved open through blood, sweat and disappointment of the man and his fellow comrades. A path he wishes not future comers to venture, they shouldn't share the same fate. Therefore, things must be done before they march to battle once more. A new breed of warriors must be recruited, groomed and tattooed with battle scars before thrown into the unforgiving battlefield.

The man has decide. He has now chosen his path at the crossroad, to journey towards rebuilding. He hopes that his past, sufferings and triumphs; knowledge and wisdom will be of use, past down, inherit and redefine by the upcoming crops of youngsters to build a better tomorrow and someday, maybe, emerge victorious in the battlefield and conquering the world.

He shall not fail this time.

Or at least he hopes not too...

the blood, the sweat, the disappointment.

APAC 2010: Reflection

So the tale of 17 nearly men (led by 4 leaders) who set out with little hope came back as men with shattered hearts. It was a journey of hope with years of preparation within each individual capacity, all of which made this hammering blow in APAC 2010 ever more excruciating.

Regardless, it was a mammoth quest to begin with, not impossible if the belief was strong enough but there was too much fear. Oh yes, fear was looming around but there was also courage. The men understood that they have to summon every ounce of courage they had to face the giants but the will did not last long enough and at times, crumbled too easily when given a few blows here and there.

There was growth as well amidst the adversities. The men realised they lacked heart and drive and what it takes to bear the flag - they learned it the hard way. But the sacrifice was not in vain as a new culture has been born out of it and will set precedent for future generations to follow when they wander down the same road.

Siap sedia berkorban, untuk ibu pertiwi.

In the end, realisation and reflection upon oneself is essential. The men may have failed, but we must all learn why they have failed and what remedies should be taken so that future generations will not share the same fate. The horizon seemed to be looming with darkness. Perseverance is what it takes and at such a time like this, we need it ever than before. The next ray of light may just penetrate through any moment now, but before that happens, let us brave ourselves to re-align our mindsets, train harder than ever and then march out to face what lies ahead.

Semboyan telah berbunyi, menuju medan bakti.

posted at BORAK BORAK FLOORBALL
24 Feb 2010

APAC 2010: We Live to Tell the Tale

We faced the Giants...
but live to tell the tale.

Intimidated?
Overwhelmed?
We barely put up a fight.

Although we managed to muster what courage is left of us and took them on for a period of time, we still eventually crumbled like a bunch of dominos.

We live to tell the tale, and we live to redeem ourselves, against another Giant.
We shall die trying... again..

APAC 2010: Slaying the Giants??

Slaying the Giant??
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We shall die trying!!